Alive Day

Two years ago at this time I began this blog. I was still so entrenched in being the "wife of a wounded soldier". I was trying to decide how I should feel about the one year anniversary of Rodney being wounded. It was a very difficult, emotional and confusing time. We were dealing with the what's, the whys and the who's of the military process.

Where are we today 2 years later on now what we know to be called his "Alive Day"? Not so stuck in the everyday bureaucracy..either because we are further down the road or just tired of dealing with something you can't move any faster than even if you try. I am much more cynical that is for sure. I am letting go of the victim associated with being the "wife of a wounded" soldier-because I have to so I can move forward...live again. I will always have had this experience and wouldn't be pursuing a master's in Social Welfare if we hadn't gone through hell and back.
The process of making sure our family gets the benefits we are entitled to continues. We are waiting on the permanent and total rating from the VA-so I can have assistance with money for school (that would help tremendously!) ....but we still wait. The other is shocking to most people....as of today Rodney has still not been released from the Kansas National Guard even though he hasn't done anything like drill since he returned home...He started the med board process which entails meeting with more/different doctors to say he is unfit for duty. This process could take up to a year when he is actually done...he has one more appointment he has to attend but it hasn't been scheduled. Once he is rated by the army (VA and Military ratings are completely different in case you didn't know that-all your tax dollars hard at work!!!)
We hope to have free health insurance for our family for life but who know??
See the cynical is coming out...sorry ;(
So are there any big "Alive Day" celebrations today...that answer is no. It is like any other ordinary day except for the fact that three years later Rodney is inpatient and most likely will be for a while our lives at home are less chaotic, we are without him again. He is not off fighting insurgents but instead battling the demons left over by war and working on things in his head that should have been addressed 3 years ago,but they take care of the physical first (I was told that at Fort Gordon after he was wounded). I am sad, but also so numb. Our family is in shambles.
Maybe it just took this amount of time to get to this place....I don't have the answers. I wish someone did, but they don't. We are not the only families in turmoil because of our situation....there are countless others. We aren't on the 5 o'clock news ...we are just dealing the best we can. Someday maybe the world will notice, but for now the world doesn't want to hear about it. So as a social worker I have my job cut out for me....job security???

The good news is....I am doing better, going to school, feeling more confident-more like the me I wasn't sure still existed, I have lost some of the baggage I was carrying-30 lbs of it and I am reaching out to friends. I am living life again!! I am still the wife of a wounded soldier, but I am not wearing it like a huge sign, it is just a part of me, not the total of who I am!

SO to Rodney...."Happy Alive Day"! It is a miracle and something worth remembering and celebrating. Sorry we can't be together to do it. Keep fighting and putting the pieces together on your end.

Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

October 12th- Two Years Later

An anniversary is today...2 years ago on October 12th in Mosul,Iraq my husband's FOB (Forward Operating Base) was attacked by insurgents when they fired multiple mortar rounds from various locations from out side the fence. My husband Spc. Rodney A. Price was wounded from a mortar blast that hit outside the door of the building he was standing in. I have heard that he was thrown 20 feet backwards when the blast came through the closed glass and metal door. He and three other soldiers were wounded from his unit. Other units from the Camp Marez also had wounded. Rodney was seriously wounded and was taken care of inside the command post where he was hit by many of his fellow 714th brothers while they continued to be under attack.
He received care from an the med-act who was dodging mortar fire to help the wounded.
He aspirated Rodney who had a collapsed lung that was filling up with blood. He had a wound to his left hip flexer that hit a major artery-and he would have bleed out had it not been for one brave soldier placing his knee and body weight on the wound to stop the bleeding.

This all happened at approx. 4:30 p.m. Iraq time which is 8 hours ahead of central standard time, so he was wounded about the time we were starting out day here in Kansas-8:30 am! I went through my day not knowing what had happened, just that I was feeling weird that day-can't really explain it-intuition?? I hadn't heard from Rodney for about 3 days, which was a little while longer than usual. I found out at 3am when Rodney's parents and sister came to our home to tell me.

Here we are 2 years later-still dealing!Some days I look back and think how can this all still be affecting our lives so strongly...still. It is all day to day-I had a dream last night I was in a mortar attack with Rodney somewhere. The brain is a complicated place full of processes that I don't even begin to understand. Why now do I have a dream such as that?

A year ago I started this blog-it has often been a life line for me. A place to go and share my feelings. A place I go and visit friends in other parts of the US and the world without ever leaving my room. To think 3 years ago I didn't even know what a BLOG was..Thank you on this anniversary day to all the readers and friends that leave "priceless" comments that make my day and help me get through the difficult ones.

I have included last years Oct. 11th post. My very first one!
Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

A Small Piece of the Puzzle from 10/12/2006

Finally...I got it done with Carley's help. This video shows Rodney's roommate (Chris) from Iraq telling his rendition of the events that happened on Oct.12, 2006. We have heard other accounts, but this was the first time (we heard this over the 4th of July 2007) we had heard anything other than what Rod's commander had told me, which was "we made contact" or from Rodney who really didn't have a clear memory of the chain of events. I will share another video from the medic who actually worked on Rodney soon. Like I said it is just a small piece of the puzzle. We still have questions to this day that will probably never be answered. We appreciate Chris sharing with us and for being there for Rodney that horrible day. Keep Imagining! Tracy