Sharing Feedback

My husband Rodney received this from a person who was a teacher in our high school up until a few years ago. He has kept in contact with Rodney over the years. He sent it to Rod after listening to my podcast on NotAlone. He is a very kind man, and it made me especially proud that someone who had been my English teacher so many years ago was impressed with what I had to say! It is nice to be acknowledged...wanted to share :)



"I listened to the whole thing. I am heartbroken for what you deal with daily. I am so impressed with Tracy. She is an incredible woman and a valiant fighter for you. There has never been any doubt that you are the love of her life. And, there is nothing she won't do or sacrifice for you. You are so blessed to have her. She is truly your gift from God."


Also one of his fellow soldiers who worked along side him during his 15 months on med hold. She also made me feel what I have been doing and continue to do is the right thing to do! She wrote the following...

"how powerful is that! I feel guilty now for giving up on my ex husband. However, wow, i listened and it had me in tears and swallowing hard. VERY GOOD way to get this out and she will CHANGE THE SYSTEM. It might not happen tomorrow. You will both change it. Maybe not completely; the more your voices are heard, the more power you have to make changes. I bet you are proud of her for making that blog and this recordings!"



Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

In Audio...

I wanted to let you know I checked out the http://www.notalone.com/ site last night and our story in my own words (with a lot of editing on their part..thank goodness...so not alot of ummms in between words). Rodney and I listened to it together last night. It sounds ok..so now you will know what my voice sounds like...weird to me! :) As the storyteller of our journey, I pray it will help some other spouse or family.

The entire site is amazing but to listen to our journey in words go to Battling the System for Your Warrior

Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

PS I was accepted to the Master's program for social welfare starting in August 2009..My first step to being in the system to help families of wounded warriors as a social worker!

A Letter to My Dad...Kenneth Wayne Curtis

Hi Dad-

It has been a long time since I last saw you, since we hugged and you kissed me, since I heard you say "I love you and everything will be alright Trace". How could today be 6 years since you left this world??

I sometimes forget for a split second that you aren't a phone call away. I would love to know that if I got into my car and drove for 5 hours that I could find you fishing on the lake in the pontoon boat you were going to buy , but never got the chance. I miss Arkansas..but without you there or Grandma & Grandpa , I don't have any connection, it is just a place.

I miss you beyond comprehension. Lisa and I talk about you and that helps. We have memories and we make each other laugh remembering, I know that makes you happy looking down upon us. You loved to laugh and tell stories..I miss that the very most. I watch the tape sometimes of you down by the low water bridge by Ponca just to hear your voice. I am so thankful to have that tape. You , Connor and I had so much fun that day.

You would be proud of my kids..your grandkids. They are growing up despite me as you would have said and some days I am not sure I am doing this parenting thing right..the letting go is hard!

They all remind me of you in their own ways. Taylor is an adventurer like you were and she gets asked like you did if she has any oriental heritage..it is those almond shaped eyes! She is living in Oklahoma, trying so hard to make a life for herself. She will be 20 years old next month. She was so brave and composed at your funeral dad..only 13 years old and singing a song to bring comfort to all of us. "I Can Only Imagine" is the song and it bring me joy and sometimes overwhelming sadness but it is the inspiration for the tattoo I have in your memory. Bet you never thought I would do the tattoo thing-I remember you panther on your arm and asking you questions about it as I grew up.

Our Carley is now 16 and so smart, mature and kind hearted. She still keeps the picture in her room of you and her together from the day you moved from Kansas back to Arkansas. That little pig-tailed girl is now a beautiful young lady with a wicked sense of humor! I think you and her would most definitely enjoy each other's company! She is still a talker, which I know is all due to you :)

Connor was only 5 when you passed away but he still remembers you, I am so grateful for that. He is 5 ft. 6 inches now...I know that is taller that you were and he isn't even 12 yet. He is all boy, playing soccer and baseball and anything else involving running, jumping etc.. He is a handsome guy but I have to say of all my kids reminds me the most of me at his age in appearance...long legged and skinny! I wish you and him could've been buddies, but I do keep you alive by talking about you to him and he does ask. He would love to have something of yours but that hasn't happened.

Things with Sheri and Sharon haven't worked out dad. I hope that doesn't disappoint you too much. I just couldn't play the games I had played for 30 plus years. I hope Sharon comes around someday and allows me and the kids to have reminders of you for sentimental value, but it isn't necessary for me to remember you..I have my memories and no one can take them.

I often wonder what my life would be like if you were still a phone call or drive away..would the last almost 3 years of dealing with Rodney's deployment and then being wounded have been easier because I had you around...I will never know. That makes me sad but I then realize I can still talk to you and you do know what is going on, even if I can't touch you or hear you. So keep watching over me Daddy! I am trying to be strong and get through-I just wish I could hear one more time "it will all work out Trace".

I love you and miss you everyday...until we see each other again...I will Keep Imagining!

Love you always

your daughter
Tracy Lynne Curtis

Telling Our Story

I am getting the most awesome opportunity today to share our story about our Priceless Journey (if you haven't read our story from the beginning go back to Oct. 2007 archives). I will have two hours to talk about deployment, when Rodney was wounded and the real heart of the story which followed up until this very minute. I feel blessed to be given the avenue in which to share on a site called notalone.com. This is a place on the Internet where I can go to listen to other's stories, read and share on the forum, and learn what has worked in their situations. The chance to be able to be in the company of others who have made similar journeys is a priceless gift in it's self. I have been searching for so long...now I know I am not alone.

I will share with you all when you can hear my feed on the site.

Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

AWOL

HI to all you in Blogland..
I thought I needed to check in...I am still here just a lot of STUFF going on-I have so much to catch up on telling as well as seeing what you all have been up to.
I have recently discovered the world of FACEBOOK! So you can find me on there Tracy Curtis Price.
I promise I will update soon my friends..I don't promise anything very often so I don't take promising lightly. BE BACK SOON!!!
Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

Want to SMILE?

Who doesn't want to SMILE??? This video was sent to me and it made me smile, laugh and brought tears to my eyes. The shear JOY was evident-I know it is mostly choreographed but I am a sucker for DANCE! I danced on a team in high school, loved dancing at clubs etc.. back in my younger days!


I enjoy the dance shows on TV immensely. I loved watching my girls dance especially Taylor who expressed herself through movement for 15 years (pray every night she will do so again).





I have come to understand with much soul searching it is one of the activities in my life thus far that has brought me happiness, fulfilment and pure joy!


I need to find a way to incorporate that into my life now. Again....any ideas???





I hope you smile! (and Dance!)

Good Dr. News!

Dr. Doesn't think at this point it is skin cancer but instead SHINGLES! I am on a med. I have to take 5x a day-he explained but I am still a little confused of the why, how and what...so you nurses out there please explain?? It is only one small spot and it itches at times-it did start out looking like a blister a couple weeks ago. My weird news for the day..
Been a actually pretty crappy day...Taylor moved today to OK, it is to frickin COLD and dreary and I am just feeling BLAH and lonely! Hope it is just for today-I had been doing really well mood wise and keeping busy and motivated.
See what Tuesday brings! For now I am going to go get in my warm jammies, watch tv and snuggle with my baby Beau!

Thanks for the thoughts and prayers! Always appreciated...

Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

Off to see the DR

Short post...I am off to my dr. appt.-I have a suspicious spot on my chest. Got to have it looked at. I have had skin cancer removed from 2 other areas 3x-first time when I was 30.
(chin and nose). It was basal cell carcinoma and not life threatening but still had to be taken off/out. Praying this is something different-not cancer of course. Too much sun worshipping.
Pray it all works out ok!

Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

Sisterly Love

Carley and her boyfriend Chris broke up the other night. She has slept with me the last 2 nights-she is heartbroken. She is 16 and this is her first time to know this kind of pain most of us have experienced at least once in our life. It hurts-physically and emotionally. She keeps telling me she wants the pain to go away-all I can do is tell her it will...give her hugs...reassure her she will come out of this a stronger, smarter person. I even sent her her balloons and CHOCOLATE at school.

She will be fine-I know that even if she doesn't know it yet. She is young but she is also very loyal and loves with all her heart. There is nothing wrong with that... but teenage relationships do run their course and are fleeting most of the time. Doesn't do any good to tell her this now-but she will figure it out...maybe with the help of her big sister...

In October my oldest daughter, Taylor and her fiance broke up. She had a horrific few weeks where I was her lifeline. I held her and was there to help her through a horrible time in her life.

Taylor is doing better and healing

Last night I watched through my own tears as Taylor sat next to Carley on the floor pulled her to her in an embrace, stroked her hair and soothed her with her words of experienced knowledge. It was endearing to witness and made me so proud of both of them. I have often wondered if they would ever be close like they were when they were little girls, if they would grow up and be best friends like me and my sister are-last night I watched as they shared their moment and I am reassured.

Taylor knows so well what the searing pain in her little sister's heart feels like, she remembers not being able to eat, she can recall the feeling of hopelessness and the thousands of tears. Taylor told Carley so many of the same things I told to her a few short months ago. Through her own life lesson she was able to reach out, show compassion and try to make it better for her sister.

I witnessed my girl's, my daughter's sharing sisterly love...nothing can beat that.

*added note-Connor loves his sister's too-he is obviously loyal and a male-his response was to want to beat Chris up. I had to smile and say that won't be necessary just give Carley a hug!:)

Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy

Where was I today?

Today was an Historical Day for our great country! It is one of those day's where other's will ask in the future where were you, did you see the swearing in ceremony for President Barack Obama? I am happy to say I was able to watch the inauguration ceremony for this 44th President, who is the new hope for this nation. A very exciting time during a time when our country is struggling, but the future doesn't look so bleak now as far as I am concerned. I have hope for change and change is needed and is good!!

Lots of change happening in my personal life these days-change is tough & painful it is also empowering and something that has to happen for growth to occur. so as I said before...CHANGE IS GOOD!

So where was I??? Well we know I was watching the festivities-no I wasn't there..I wish!! I was sitting in the dentist chair!!!! For those who have been reading my blog for a while you might recall how much I detest going to the dentist!! I do hate it and my dentist, whom is very kind and gentle, know it! I had to have another crown done-uggh! The bad part was getting my mouth numb enough to work on my tooth..that's how I got to see so much on TV (which they have in every patient room-very cool!) Up and down I went-with a total of 7 yes seven shots!!!
I was so numb I couldn't feel my entire mouth, but the job is done for today. I was brave :) and I got to watch something historical with the hygienist and the dentist.

but I will remember this day not for the pain of the dentist-but for the future of our country and all it holds due to a new era that began today!


So where were you today??

PS-I just saw part of his speech at the Commander in Chief Ball-Thanks for mentioning the families Mr. President! HOOAH!

Trying to Keep Imagining!
Tracy